Few things about Neopolitan pizza are tragic, except for one storied eating mishap.
You know the one. You sensuously bring a slice of soft pizza to your lips, anticipating the sensation of burst tomato and fresh burrata on the tongue, only to have the toppings slip from the crust and crash onto the plate with a sloppy slosh.
"Why do bad things happen to good people?" you ask yourself.
"This pizza is broken; it's wrong," you think. "Life shouldn't be like this."
Actually, you're eating it wrong, you pompous fool, and we've got word from a pizza expert who knows this stuff to prove it.
It's food writer Daniel Young, who has dedicated his time to the worthy task of pizza education. A video on his YouTube account details proper pie-holding technique demonstrated by an actual Italian chef.
Neopolitan protocol, the duo said, calls for folding pizza up like a wallet -- how it used to be served on the streets of Naples. The maneuver prevents topping leakage and makes consumption easy both at the table and on the go.
Simply fold the pizza in half, fold it again, tuck it in a napkin and cradle it like the precious baby you never had.
The wallet technique is practical for many reasons. It eliminates the need for slicing, as one is able to hold an entire pizza in one's hand, which is in and of itself a dream come true. It renders the snooty method of eating pizza with a fork and knife obsolete. It also does away with the difficulty of trying to hold Neopolitan pizza by the crust, a task no mortal can accomplish.
Why does the wallet technique not apply to the standard American slice? American pies are made of a stiffer dough that can withstand the forces of gravity to maintain form, even when lifted by a hungry diner. Neopolitan dough is thinner, softer and therefore more prone to messiness; if you hold a slice at either end, you can make it do the worm.
Interested in living the Neopolitan way? Learn it all on Young's channel here.